Final statement

For once in my life I feel as if I have found my voice through my art. When I hear my voice I feel empowered and makes we want to explore and investigate my artwork. But I feel I am Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, one moment my artwork takes on a soft loving tone, while the next is more sinister and darker than ever before

It is through this sinister side that I am able to create art that I have always wanted to create. My voice is irritated for society ignores the dysfunction that has come to the surface of the world. My voice is lashing out at society because of my pent up frustration with its scapegoat mentality. My mind is constantly saying, “I am mad as hell and I am not going to take it anymore”.

I am no longer softly whispering, but I am screaming at the top of my lungs. The viewer is no longer in the shadows searching to find meaning in my piece. They are touched and moved by my work. They are moved for the work allows them to step into the shoes of someone they may actually know or can connect to.

The viewer is able to interact with my thoughts and my feelings towards the world by actually taking part in the performance. They are able to feel the pain and agony that can come with dysfunction. It is through this exploration my work has gradually molded me into the artist I want to be, an artist with meaning. I intend the viewer will be able to show empathy and understanding of my work.

1st revision

For once in my life I feel as if I have found my voice through my art. When I hear my voice I feel empowered and makes we want to explore and investigate my artwork. But I feel I am Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, one moment my artwork takes on a soft loving tone, while the next is more sinister and darker than ever before.

It is through this sinister side that I am able to create art that I have always wanted to create. My voice is frustrated for dark subjects such as body image are often ignored and brushed aside by society. My voice is lashing out at society because my mind is constantly saying, “I am mad as hell and I am not going to take it anymore”.

I am no longer softly whispering, but I am screaming at the top of my lungs. The viewer is no longer in the shadows searching to find meaning in my piece. They are touched and moved by my work for they are able to interact with my thoughts and my feelings towards the world. It is through this exploration my work has gradually molded me into the artist I want to be, an artist with meaning and true intentions.

Rough Draft of Statement

For once in my life I feel as if I have found my voice through my art. The viewer is no longer in the shadows searching to find meaning in my piece, but are touched and moved by my work. They are able to interact with my thoughts and my feelings towards the world. But I feel I am Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, one moment my artwork takes on a simple loving feeling, while the next is more sinister and darker than ever before.

It is through this sinister side that I am able to create art that I have always wanted to create. I don’t feel like I have to hold back in my work. I believe it is from having a normal childhood and family that I have become interested in the dysfunctional world that surrounds us. I am interested in the topics that have been noticed but are swept under the rug.

I am no longer softly whispering but I am screaming at the top of my lungs. I feel free to explore and investigate my artwork. I have found a niche that I want to explore further until there is nothing left to explore and I must move on to the next niche for my work. Through this exploration my work has gradually molded me into the artist I want to be, an artist with meaning and true intentions.

Adderley Lecture

This years Adderley lecturer was Xenobia Bailey. The Adderley lecture was started in 1995 in honor of Tyrone Adderley and helps bring African American artist to Massart. Bailey in a funk inspired fiber artist dealing with traditional women's work and the transformation into fine art. She mainly crochets her vibrant design packed work. This is clothing not for the simple and basic dressed woman it is for the woman who wants o wow the world. the woman who wants a one of a kind that makes everyone have their eyes on her. Bailey shows a strong connection to the identity of ancient Africa in her work titled "Paradise Under Reconstruction in the Aesthetic of Funk".

Eventhough she has taken designs from a Navajo basket weave the designs come together with the shape and colors that of a true African identity. She first started this process by making hats. When she first started making hats she didn't know what it would be in the beginning. She would start and let it become what it was meant to become then she would name the project. These projects were created by first crocheting a kuffi like shape and then sculpting it at the end. To finish the hat she would laquer the outside. To go with these hats she started to create her own earings to match her wonderful creations.


When Bailey started to make garments she used patterns from exteriors of homes. These garments are able to be machine washed and dryed and are very durrable. they are meant to hug the body and are easy and comfortable to wear. it is from the garments she moved to making Mandalas. she considers her mandalas to be extremely primal and close to nature. She has one of her mandalas at the Americn Embassy in Ghana and she has even advertised Absolut with her vibrant cricheted creations. One of the most deeply moving pieces was the cotton picking bag that was then made into a memorial for her friend who died in 9/11 and had helped install all of her work.

While making her mandalas she started adding records into the circles. She would take the title of the song and make it the title of her work. These mandalas than became mditation and prayer rugs. She also create vinettes with varius elements that become one. She combines her rugs, mandalas, hats, earings, and garments to make an installation. These have to do with nature and identity. examples of these vinettes are "Sister Harvest" and "Sister Paradise". To keep her inspiration coming she likes to go for walks inboth Prospect park in Brooklyn and Central Park in Mahattan. She gets insiration and vitality from the interweaving and interconnection of the branches of the trees.

All together now, all together now...

For the final push for this class I have chosen to go along with my last subject of perfection. I want to go along with the ideal beauty and portray it from ancient times to now. I want to show the differences from the vuluptious bodies of ancient greece to the natural bodies of the 1960s and 1970s. I want to show how women would look if we would keep on the track we are on. I want to see the transformation through time. Maybe it would be more of how fashion has shaped our bodies through the ages.

I'm going to portray this project throught either book form or a simple display along the wall similar to what I did with the pictures of Arnold. I want to go in with pens, embroidery, and even cut outs. Maybe start off with a solvent transfer and go from there. I want to portray a idea that every one knows about today; how fashion and media maybe not directly but idirectly affects how we see and portray ourselves. We have the freedom to be who we want to be not what our culture expects of us.

phase 3

For my third project I am doing a journal with a not nice saying it it. I believe my idea for my projects are not a lot about celebrities and perfection but more about what people will do to their minds and bodies to try to keep up with the crowd. I had visited some sites for Pro Anna and let me say I was frightened. Girls would tell other girls how to stay skinny and what to do to resist urges. I thought this was very unhealthy especially for girls who are teenagers where weight starts to really become an issue. I thought what are these girls thinking in their minds are they too fat. A lot of girls find ways to show their progress of become skinn so they know how much more they need to do.

My project is going to be slightly different than a diary of someone who is striving to be skinny. Mine is going to be someone stuck on one thought and reiterates that thought through out their journal. I have a small black book that I plan to fill out in very nice cursive, since I have good handwriting. I hope most people will think it is a nice diary but when they start reading it hopefully it will frighten them or more likely think the person who wrote it was sick. I notice in this class and my other classes, that I am started to work with more darker ideas when it comes to my work. The interesting part is I came from a great family, sure there were difficult times but my family showed me love and affection and strive to make sure got an education.

phase 2

Going along with perfection I move onto the women. To me, women strive to be this stick that men flaunt around with. We look week like we will faint at anytime. When we start starving ourselves not because we don't have any food but because we want to look skinny there is a problem. When we start looking like victims from the Holocaust there are some issues we need to deal with. We have become insecure with ourselves and our bodies.



The images that we see today show that you need to be thin with no imperfections. You can't be that traditional girl that is average with a normal body that eats healthy. It is like we only see the two extremes people who are really thin or people who are really big. We have become fascinated with people weight and their battles with their image. We are constantly bombarded by shows who show what celebrities do or shows that show people who have gotten gastric bypass. What happend to eat right and exercise. I don't like going to the gym but i at least walk everywhere.


Girls today are looking up to people who are insecure in their own bodies that they could not possibly be able to show what normal is. Why is it that we strive to look so thin? Why do peope only seem to say you look great afteryou have lost some weight. We are getting mixed feelings from our culture around us. We are bombarded with images of the thin and the big but where are we? Where is the normal woman? The scary part is girls are starting to do unhealthy things at a younger and younger age. Kids are starting to diet, diet what the fuck. We know most people ose their baby fat when they get older. To diet a kid is like getting them ready to be the stick figure that we see.

The project for this phase is a semi installation. I have been experimenting with sound studio and I am planning to create some audio to go with the installation. I will set up a wall mirror (one where you can at least see from the torso up) and have my audio play as you walk by. I hope to have the viewer come up and stand and listen. I want them to hear what many people keep locked up in their mind. The little voice behind us in our culture.

This some shit people can find on the internet!!! :

http://www.theskinnywebsite.com/site/
http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1081711
http://www.geocities.com/haven_of_the_delicate_sylph/index.html

phase 1

My first phase of this project is dealing with the idea of perfection in men. It isn't just women who strive to find perfection in their bodies, men do it just as much whether they want to admit it or not. Of course when your job depends on showing off an amazing body you do whatever it takes to keep it in that shape. But we all know someone who is older can not have the amazing body that they had when they were twenty when they a hell of a lot older, well maybe with a diet, created by a nutritionist then cooked to perfection by a personal chef and then a crazy finatical trainer to whoop their ass into shape.



We would all be tight and buff if we had the time, energy and resources to do so. Why do men feel inferior when they are lazy couch potatoes who sit on their ass eating greasy food saying that they could look like those male fitness models if they wanted to. Some do strive and succeed in becoming the next fitness model but as we all know you have to start off with the right genetics. Sometimes we just don't realize that we can only make our body go so far. Some people, know matter what they do will always have a bigger shape then skinny people.



I got a little off track, men who strive for perfection. where do they find the model to base perfection off of? Do they go around looking in every book to see what is perfection? My guess is they open up the next magazine and see a model (whose job is to look amazing) and say I need to look like that. But why do some do this and others don't because hell some of us can say fuck perfection, I am happy eating what I want and exercising when I feel like it. We weren't made with two feet for nothing. Just using your body to get from point A to point B should be enough to keep you on track.


On to my project for this phase. I am going to make emulsion lifts of who other than former gym rat Arnold hmself and use them to incorporate into a book of some fashion. I would like to add maybe some writing or drawing on these lifts to add some dimension and meaning to the piece. I was thinking to show transformation from a sculpted man of perfection to the slightly out of shape man he is today, the Governator.

Project 2

With the recent boom in the fascination with celebrity lives I thought I wanted to take a topic that splits off from that. The idea that we look at these people as role models for how we act or how we should look like is ridiculous. Of course there are some good role models that are also celebrities but there are also the daddy rich girls that flaunt about with barely anything on and barely holding on to a good reputation. I often think "how do these people perceive themselves"? Do they think " I am pretty and just having fun, deal with it".

I am glad my childhood was great with reassuring parents and brothers that were great role models, well maybe not for everything. Is there no one in our world today that is secure with who they are? Are we just going to inject and suck out everything including our souls? What about our negative view towards our bodies? Why can't people get that we look beautiful when we are natural not sticks with limbs? I want to take the idea of perfection and body image to the extreme. I want to show how celebrities are human too. They can't look perfect forever. There comes a time in life when you ask is it all worth it or do I just want to be myself?

I hate our society laughs at peoples problems. Some problems are just not a laughing matter. If I was at the fucking View when the audience was laughing at Rosie when she was poking fun at Anna Nicole Smith (just hours before her death!) I would of gotten up at yelled at everyone. Who the fuck thinks someone's problems is a laughing matter. It is not funny that she has problems with drugs or to make fun of someone who probablly has very negative views towards themselves. I want people to see what we look at and what we aspire to be. Our society has made us completelly insecure with our bodies but it isn't completelly their fault for as humans we have brains, most of us know right from wrong. The question i have for you is "If a celebrity asked you to jump off a brige would you do it?".

Walter "Rusty" Crump

I walked into the Brant gallery to find a projector and screen set up in the middle of the room. I was confused by the work on the walls and what the talk was going to be about, but then I realized the work on the walls had nothing to do with the talk and I walked towards the tables set up along the windows. I look at the black and white photographs with facination of how can a single pinhole create such warped images as if I was looking through a fish-eye lense. The warped images remind me slightly of Gursky's photographs. I moved down along the table and came upon a various assortment of cameras. I found the cameras to also be pieces of art for they were decorated with collages accented by paint and various other things.



I sat down in the back and the slide show started. The artist introduced himself. He said his name was Walter Crump but people call him "Rusty". He got that name from his mother for she thought he was going to have red hair. He told us he original was schooled in painting and printmaking and teaches at the Commonwealth School near Copley square. He became interested in photography when his students wanted to have a photography course. He originally was a traditional photographer but when all of his equipment was stolen out of his car in Worcester, MA he decided to stick with just pinhole cameras. Crump then presented some of the work from the AIB exhibit. The show consists of work by seven Polish pinhole artists. The photographs were amazing and made me want to see the whole show at AIB.



He explained how pinhole cameras don't have a depth of field therefore creating very surrealistic photographs. He explained that the photos look warped because the hole creates and elipse where the edges are stretched and the center is a circle. He said he finds joy out of happenstance and also explained that you don't know what you will get until the film is developed. This is not true for paper negatives. Paper negatives? I had never heard of paper negatives. He explained that it is just plain black and white photo paper. I was amazed, I finally found a way to use my extra photo paper. This definitely sparked my interest and who knows maybe a project...

http://www.geocities.com/waltercrump/

Fiona Tan

" It started off as a search, now it feels as if I'm constantly in search of my search". Fiona Tan


Fiona Tan was born in Indonesia in 1966 and currently works in Amsterdam. She is a video artist that creates a portrait of humanity. She composes both actual footage and pictures to create an unbias portrait that record time's passage. She uses her work to show you a culture that you wouldn't think about. Through her work you are able to indentify with the other culture and learn to see that they are similar to me and you. She searches for the truth and the true nature behind all human beings.


Her most well known project was created for the UCLA Hammer Museum in 2004 in conjunction with both the Museum of Contemporary Art in Chicago and the New Museum of Contemporary Art in New York. The project called "Correction" was a three hour long video portrait of both prisoners and guards at four prisons, three in Illinois and one in California. She had them stand still looking straight into the camera. By using control she was able to capture the slightest of movements made by the guards and inmates. It was projected on six screens and were placed to create a Panopticon, which was designed to watch over prisoners in the 1700s.


Tan creates her work by using photos and images and video stills or video in a portrait style. She places her figures in vertical position almost like a typical portrait. Her style is that of a simple documentary that shows no bias to the final piece. This allows the viewer to bring their own thoughts and ideas to the piece. The projections are very simplistic and straightforward for Tan's ability to control the shot allows the true nature of the person to come through.

"blurs the line between film and photography - between the moving and the static image - and between viewer and viewed" Art Press




Further Reading:
tele-journeys, MIT List Visual Arts Center Cambridge, MA 2002 p. 30-31, 39-40

Rollig, Stella, :Video as a Female Terrain Springer-Verlag / Wien 2000 p. 190-195

Afterimage 33 no2 52-3 S/O 2005 Inmate Intimacy? Fiona Tan: Correction

Art In America 99 no10 176 N 2005 Fiona Tan at the New Museum of Contemporary Art

Art Press no316 74-5 O 2005 FIONA TAN

Websites:
http://www.hammer.ucla.edu/exhibitions/82/
http://www.frithstreetgallery.com/tan.html
http://www.universes-in-universe.de/car/venezia/bien49/plat1/e-tan.htm
http://www.tate.org.uk/tateetc/issue2/anothertimespace.htm

Public Exhibitions:
http://www.artfacts.net/index.php/pageType/artistInfo/artist/12499

Cynthia Atwood

I went to see the work of Cynthia Atwood with my alternative photo on fabric class. Cynthia Atwood is a local artist that works with fabrics and composition to compose amazing works of art. Each has its own little perfections and surprises. Cynthia was there to give us a talk about her work. She told us she works with fabric because of the texture and feel as she works with the medium. The interesting thing is it is only a personal experience that she gets to have for she has plastered the walls with do not touch signs. The works have a very natural and organic flowing feeling. They seem almost plant like. Each piece was created by tucking and stiching, both hand and machine, until Cynthia thought it was completed. She explained that some pieces take three or four times to complete for she will change her mind on the color. She also explained that one of her pieces was completed but the fabric got a stain on it, so she had to unstich and restich new fabric onto her piece. The room flowed as the work gave the room a calm and relaxing feeling. Cynthia's work was whimsical for I could imagine a world where these pieces would come to life.

http://www.simmons.edu/trustman/

chutes and ladders

My installation was like a game of chutes and ladders. There were times where I was climbing up all of the ladders, but then I fell down a chute. I realized my idea was there, but it didn't completely lend itself to the viewer. The viewer found no purpose in interacting with my installation. They would climb the ladder only to find words, and to most people that is not satisfying. I needed a hook, a way to draw people up the ladder and to help the viewer understand where to go on the ground. Sure people felt uncomfortable, but that was it. There was no inner satisfaction of meaning or feeling just a wow I climbed a ladder and now I am going to have to get down. I think the words were not enough and I feel the words are an after thought. I think my main purpose was not just to make people feel uncomfortable but to give them satisfaction in what they were doing. Even though my classmates made a lot of great suggestions I feel this project needs to go on a list of things to work out later.

Project

I am stuck in a rut and I can't seem to find my way out. I have these visions in my mind or what I want to do but when I try to get them out my mind goes blank. I start to think about one thing and then another pops up. I don't have much experience in installation work but I am willing to struggle with it.

I am an adult but when it comes to my art I seem to take a role of a child. My voice is lost among my art as a child's is lost among a crowd of adults. I can't get the attention I want except when I fall flat on my face as I jump around the adults to get their attention. My voice has grown slowly into a teen but I still have moments when I crawl back towards being a baby and having the crowd of adults saying how cute.

I know I want the viewer to feel uncomfortable and I want my message to give them that reaction. I plan to work with simple sentences or even just words to cause the viewer to react in the way I want them to. I don't know if it will be successful but it is a learning process and the more mistakes I make the more I will learn. I just hope my mistakes are too big that I fall into a deeper hole.